After sharing lots of personal past things yesterday,falling in love once again, seeing her photos,sleeping.........then waking up with a heavy heart at 4.30 am in the morning,just sitting with blanket all over the body,face,eyes shut tight..........to go deep into that darkness which lies inside darkness.......just to feel myself..........wondering k 'is my love so weak that she still can't feel my love?'.........just sitting there, breathing deep breaths to feel alive and knowing that i cant escape this...because even if my mind tells me that all this is going to end one day.........even then my heart says that this is something altogether different........yes may b in the end she will never feel my love.....or else she will realize it.....yet never accept it............i hopelessly took my guitar and played this song..........
again breaking into tears when it goes "Tune mere jaana........kabhi nahi jaana......."
After crying sufficiently it came to me that i am a third person in her life...........she has started it all wrong..........not her fault.....thats why she hasn't realized yet.....
now i crave for emptiness.......now i crave for emptiness.....
all my love she thought as 'help'.........all my emotions........i dont know......has she ever thought of it or not???????...
i want to clear the things up........i want to clear the things up....
